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Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Balancing Act

So many of my days, I have too much - too much that I want to do, too many thoughts in my head, too many things that I feel that I will never get to.

I make my lists and my to do's, short term and long term. I schedule my weeks so I can pencil in a time to get to these things. I remember my goals and tell myself to take my baby steps toward them. Then, my indecisiveness kicks in.


Look for volunteer opportunities - should I work with kids? Teens? Adults?
Find the right grad program - should I choose counseling or social work?
Register for a class - but do I have more interest in painting, or photography, or learning the ecology of my region? 
I need to get out of the house. Make a choice. Change the world. I can do this. 

And then I become paralyzed by  - what? I don't know. The fear of failure? The guilt of taking time away from my kids to do something for myself for once? My lack of reliable babysitters?

This I do know: I want, NEED, to be more than a mom and housewife. I am good at many things, interested in countless topics, and have future career hopes and dreams. It's difficult to balance all of my desires along with all of the have-to's and need-to's. But honestly, I have to figure it out, otherwise I am afraid that some day I will end up angry or resentful or both, and my family is far too wonderful and supportive to put the blame on, when I know who is holding me back. Me.

As Sara Yamtich puts it, "There are so many ways that you could contribute to the world. And you’d probably be pretty darn sufficient at most of them. This is the fate of the multipotentialite."

It's just difficult to choose which one, and where to fit it into to my crazy life. 

Do you ever feel like this too?

On September 8, at 4pm PST, (7pm EST), I am going to be joining a community call hosted by Sara Yamtich and Jade Rivera, to discuss how we can accept, celebrate, and harness our multipotentiality. 

I encourage you to read Sara's blog and feel inspired and motivated, and then sign up for the call. From personal experience, after speaking with Sara for an hour, I felt like anything was possible, and that all I needed to do was to take the first steps to make it happen.

Jade is full of compassion and wisdom, her blog has helped me understand myself and my children better, and she has become a good friend. I am looking forward to speaking with these intelligent ladies, and others that are possibly in a rut like me, or have made it out of the rut, and have words of wisdom and support.

 Hope to "meet" you then!

6 comments:

  1. Oh Nicole, thank you again for sharing your story and sharing the information for our call. Most of all thank you for your friendship. <3

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  2. Thank YOU, Jade. I'm so glad to have you as a friend as well. <3

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  3. So well put, Nicole! The lists, oh the lists!

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    1. They get out of hand, don't they? And then on particularly unmotivated weeks, I make lists of the things that I HAVE done instead of what I need to do! Haha. :)

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  4. I can relate 100% to everything you've written. Heading over to check out Sara's blog & check out the information on the call.

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    1. I'm so glad! I hope to meet you on the call!

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